


We go out, yes?

by Kojont



Category: Grand Theft Auto IV
Genre: Closeted Character, Language, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-02-26
Updated: 2013-02-26
Packaged: 2017-12-03 16:43:52
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,303
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/700470
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Kojont/pseuds/Kojont
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>No matter how many times Niko Bellic contacts him, he will never date him.</p>
            </blockquote>





	We go out, yes?

**Author's Note:**

> I might write a sequel to this at some point, since I really enjoyed writing this and I think there's still so much more to explore between these two.

In my life I had been cut, I had been beaten, I had even been shot. None of those things had felt quite as painful as that moment at 3 am when I stared at the computer screen at Tw@ and read the lines Matte “Don't Label Me” Black had wrote to me. Ok, maybe I had been pushing my luck with my fourth date request after he had declined the three previous ones, but still. I leaned back, sprawled on the chair in the empty internet cafe and stared at the words.

“Leave me the fuck alone! I – DON'T – WANT – TO – DATE – YOU! Do you understand English, you fucking stupid piece of shit?! If you click that fucking button one more time, I'll report you! Fucking sad loser!”

Now, I knew that I wasn't a looker. I looked like shit in my user picture, unshaven and in dirty clothes, but even looking like this I had never had trouble getting laid. The fags in Belgrade had kept their mouths shut and legs spread, just like I wanted, whenever I wanted. I don't think I had ever been rejected once in my life.

I snorted at the words and wished I could send the snotty four-eyed brat a reply. He clearly thought he was somehow better than me, fucking art-fag from Liberty City, USA. Probably wasn't even a true fag, just played one to see what kind of attention he would get and then giggled about it with his friends. I fumbled the cell out of my pocket and called Roman to send me one of his cars to take me home.

I had known from the first days in Liberty City that life here wouldn't be what I had thought it would be. There wouldn't be any fresh starts or clean slates, just the same thieves, thugs and pimps as back home. Sure the hookers had bigger tits and the cars were more expensive but neither of those things actually put any more dollars into my pocket. I was a hired gun now just like I had been in Serbia and there wasn't any of the sexual freedom I had imagined in my mind. The same fucking homophobic jokes to which I had to react in the only correct way; threatening to beat everyone around me.

Roman wasn't smart, but he knew things bothered me. He kept asking me, if I needed something more, like he could give me something more than an apartment and few odd jobs driving his cabs. He kept bothering me about Michelle, asking if we had gone out and if we had fucked. No, we hadn't. Michelle kept calling me every now and then, even when I hadn't called her once. I hadn't gone out with her once after that horrible night at the bowling place when I thought I would rather hang myself than listen to any more of her crap about her OCD's. Roman offered to take me to see some whores too, but I told him I could find them on my own.

I was hanging out with one of my least favorite people – Brucie, when faith knocked on my door, as the Americans so poetically say. I was sitting at Brucie's garage, smoking and listening to his crap about some personal push-up record. Brucie was tweaking a '05 vette I had brought him the day before.

“Is this the place?”

Brucie's story didn't stop, the man probably didn't even hear the voices over his high-pitched howling. I turned my head to the sunny street where two guys stood, one of them nodded to the other. The dark haired one walked closer and my ciggy hand froze in front of my mouth as I recognized him. Matte Black looked pissed, but adorable. He was small framed, 170 tall at most and thin as hell. He was wearing jeans, a black jacket over a red T-shirt and his nerdy, black framed glasses. He could have passed as straight, if it hadn't been for the rainbow colored scarf and the messenger bag over his shoulder.

“Hey!” he snapped at us and got Brucie to shut up and turn towards them. “Do you have a white 330 BMW here? Stolen last week.”

I could almost see how Brucie swelled, sucking air in and puffing himself, straightening his back and spreading his arms. It was like watching a nature movie about a threatened blowfish. “I tell you what I have here, your mother sucking my cock!” Brucie answered, pointing the brat with his wrench.

“That car was stolen from my friend and it was seen here!” Matte shouted, seemingly not impressed by Brucie. The boy's friend was standing further away, looking like he didn't even want his car back anymore.

“Run the fuck off before I break your neck!” Brucie shouted, his voice getting painfully high again.

“I'll fucking call the cops, if you--!” the kid stopped as Brucie rushed forward lifting the wrench in the air. It would have connected too, if I hadn't stepped in and taken the tool to myself. It was only then that Matte looked at me. It took awhile, but he did recognize me, I could tell by the shocked look on his face.

“Get rid of them!” Brucie yelled at me and backed off, clearly thinking I was here to do his dirty work. “Fucking twist their necks! Yeah! Break their legs and crack their skulls and--!”

“Hey”, I said calmly to Matte and tossed the wrench away. He was staring at me in fear, shaking a bit from Brucie's assault.

“Hi.” His voice was quiet and somewhat trembling.

“What? You know this fag?” Brucie was side stepping and hovering behind me, making me want to hit him instead.

I glanced at Brucie and then back at Matte. “Yeah”, I said in lighter tone. “He's... friend of a friend.”

“Well tell your friend of a fucking friend that I don't have his bimmer and that if he accuses me being a car thief I fucking hang him from his balls and use him as a punching bag!”

I stared at Matte's pale face and full lower lip and smiled as nicely as I could. “I'm sorry, your friend's car is not here.” My accent came out thicker than I wanted. I had become more aware of it the first time Vladimir had called me a yokel.

Matte glanced at Brucie and was clearly weighing his options. He measured me with his eyes, taking note on more details than I cared and lifted his chin up. “Don't bullshit me.”

I laughed a little, I had to, he was just too cute. He actually believed that I was so in love with him, even after all the bullshit he wrote to me, that I would get his car back to him just like that. “I am sorry”, I repeated with a shrug. “It is best for you to leave now.”

“Yeah?” Matte arched his eyebrows. “Does your friend know what you're up to in the net?”

It was my turn to feel uneasy. It wasn't like I was scared of Brucie or that he would believe shit like that from some random passerby, but if Matte was stupid enough to call me a fag in public, I had no other choice but to beat him up. “Your funeral”, I said calmly and tilted my head. Matte was still weighing his options when I decided to take pity on him. “Go wait with your friend, I talk with Brucie.”

The boy let his eyes wander around the garage, before he turned and walked outside. I turned to Brucie.

“You have the car?”

Brucie didn't look happy. “I'm not giving it back! What is this; a welfare center?”

“Come on, I know the kid, his cousin”, I corrected, but Brucie didn't notice anything. “I'll get you another one for free, just say when and where.”

That seemed to calm Brucie down a bit. He wiped his oil stained hands to a piece of rag. “I took the engine out, planned on changing it. You know, get that son of a bitch some serious power!”

I took a moment to make sure I hadn't gone deaf from the shout. “Can you get it working by tomorrow?”

Brucie huffed. “I fucking hate shit like this man! I have a nice fucking car and now some fucking little fag comes up and takes my money!”

“I'll get you another car for free!” I raised my voice to get the message in to his thick head. “You don't lose any money!”

Brucie waived his arms. “Fine! I'll have it running by tomorrow and you're going to get me something fucking pretty for this! I mean some fucking classy piece of shit!”

“Just say when and where.” I tossed my cigarette away as I walked to the boys. “Your car will be here tomorrow”, I told the other one.

“Why not now?” Matte asked, folding his arms.

“Because it is not here right now”, I told him in mocking tone, like I was talking to a cheeky child. “Do you need a ride somewhere? I can take you”, I waived my hand towards them. East Hook wasn't far from anywhere, but I felt like I had to offer.

“Yeah, right”, Matte snorted and took a look at me once more. I began to hate the way he did that, made me feel like a second class with just one look. “The car better be here tomorrow or I'll bring cops.”

I could have told him how little I cared, but I didn't. I just stared at him walking away. It was a nice view.

It was the first time I had set an alarm clock in Liberty City. The first time I definitely didn't want to miss something. I was in East Hook at noon, but there was no one there. I had time to smoke five cigarettes before I got bored and broke in to the garage from the back room window.

The BMW was there, in prime condition. I let my hand slide across the hood, feeling the cool metal under my palm. It was a nice car, no wonder the kid had gotten pissed off. I rarely paid any thoughts to the people whose cars I stole. I never thought about what kind of people they were. It appeared that at least some of them had nice friends.

Matte and his little friend got there before Brucie. I opened the garage door to them and let them see the car. The other boy smiled, but Matte was pissed as usual.

“The keys?” He held out his hand.

“They are not mine to give. We wait for Brucie”, I told him.

“And when is he getting here?”

“Soon.” I sat down to the same crate I had used as a chair yesterday. “You want beers? Smokes?”

“No, thank you.” The look on Matte's face was anything but kind. He looked like I had just offered him dead rats.

I glanced at the other boy, who was still fidgeting restlessly. “Does your friend know me?” I asked Matte.

They glanced at each other. “Yeah, I told him”, he answered, like it wasn't a big deal. Maybe it wasn't for him. Matte probably had gotten hundreds of date proposals.

“It wasn't nice what you wrote. All the fuck offs and stuff”, I told him. I had to grin a little, otherwise he might have thought I was heart broken or something.

“You were creepy”, he said with a shrug.

“You were pretty”, I replied honestly. He turned his eyes to me and we stared at each other for few seconds. I was painfully aware how much I wanted to kiss him. “You still are.”

“And you're still creepy”, he snorted. “What are you, a car thief or something?”

“Or something”, I said with a grin.

“Russian?”

I laughed out more. “These things are usually told during a date.”

He rolled his eyes and turned to stare at the road, waiting for Brucie to show up. “Dream on.”

I lit a cigarette and leaned my back against the garage doorway. “Why don't you go out with me?”

“You're not my type.”

“I could be. You don't even know me.” I knew I sounded desperate, but I didn't care. This was most likely the last time I ever got to talk to the boy. I didn't expect him to say yes anyway, I was just messing with him, trying to make him feel as uncomfortable as possible. It was petty of me, but who cared.

“Yeah?” He turned back to me with raised eyebrows. “Do you know anything about art? Literature? Fashion?”

A grin spread across my face. “I know about fucking. Is that anywhere on your list?” Matte's cheeks turned red, which made him look even cuter. Innocent. His friend let out a snicker. “If you want to talk about books and shoes, I can talk about books and shoes. Let me buy you a dinner. We talk and if you don't want to see me after that, fine, I won't bother you again.”

He was silent for a long time, before sighing. “Fine.”

“Great!” I stood up immediately and seemed to startle Matte.

“What? Now?!” he exclaimed.

“Yes.” I didn't see the problem. Did it make any difference? Sure I could shave and change clothes, but would that really make any difference in this situation? The damage was already done and I really didn't feel like letting Matte slip by again.

“But I have... things to do!”

“We go now and make it lunch, otherwise you will cancel.”

“But..! What about the car?” he turned to his friend for help.

“Brucie will be here soon. Your friend can wait.” I turned to the other boy. “If Brucie gives you any trouble tell him Niko was here already and promised you the car. And that I will pay him back.” The other boy nodded and mumbled something to reply. “We go?” I asked Matte.

“Jesus”, he sighed and pressed his hand against his forehead. “Sure. Let's go.”

“Hop in”, I said as I pulled open the passenger side door of my newly found car, a blue Saber. Matte sat down and I walked around the car to driver's seat. I turned the engine on and offered my hand to the boy. “Niko.”

“Matt”, he answered unenthusiastic.

“Not Matte?”

“No.”

“Nice to meet you.” I drove off from East Hook and tried to come up with a nice enough place to eat. I didn't know any really fancy places, but I headed across Broker Bridge to Algonquin. There must be some decent restaurants. “So, Matt. You study something?”

“Art history.”

He didn't say anything else. I had no idea what studying art history was about other than maybe the history of art, so I didn't continue with the subject. “I'm Serbian.”

“Wha?” Matt seemed to snap out of his thoughts.

“I'm not Russian, I'm Serbian”, I explained and glanced at the boy. “You know where that is?”

“Yeah”, he sounded like I had offended him. “The Balkans, got it's independence few months ago.”

“You know a lot. Not many people I have met know these things.”

“I bet they don't”, Matt mumbled and sighed then, clearly indicating how not interested he was about talking. “So, what brought you here?”

It was easy enough question, I had been asked that a lot since I arrived. “New beginning. The land of opportunities and all that.”

“And now you steal cars”, Matt said laconic.

“I help out friends”, I corrected. “I do few favors to them and they help me get started.”

“Started on what?”

I smiled. “I haven't decided yet.”

“Sounds like you have a solid plan.” Matt turned to face the window as to cover his expression of disbelief.

“I don't like plans, I like freedom. For now I see what this country is like and when I know what I want to do, I do it.” I couldn't say if my answers were impressing Matt or not. He was silent and leaning his elbow against the window. “I'm still new here so I don't know much about the restaurants.” I glanced at him.

“There's plenty good ones in Chinatown”, he mumbled. “Turn left from there.”

I drove according to his orders and parked outside a small Chinese restaurant. I had never eaten Chinese food before, but I wasn't too worried. I wasn't picky. We walked in and to a corner table by the windows. Matt ordered a Pepsi and I took water. The menu was just as overwhelming as I had feared so I just smoothly said “I'll have the same”, as Matt placed his order.

The waiter left and Matt raised his eyebrows. “You're a vegetarian?”

I didn't even blink even though I cursed in my mind. I was anything but a vegetarian. “I like to try new things. How about you?”

“Yeah”, he said, sounding a bit unsure. “I haven't eaten meat in like... four years or something.”

I nodded. I don't think I could have survived that long with sprouts and onions and all that shit. “That is a long time. You like animals then?” I immediately remembered the time I had used a dog as a target practice with few other boys during the war. It had been winter and I wasn't sure but I could almost swear that someone had eaten that dog afterwards too.

“I do, although that's not the main point.”

“What is?”

“The whole factory farming culture and the fact that killing any animal for food is unnecessary, since people could eat only vegetarian food and live healthier. If everyone stopped eating meat or just cut the amount in half... Oh hell, I don't want to start preaching. It would just affect a lot of things, that's all.” I nodded again and wished I could contribute to the conversation. “What did you do before you came to Liberty City?”

I took my time answering, since I knew Matt wouldn't like what I would say. But I couldn't lie about something so basic about me. “Bad things I'm not proud of.”

“Like?”

I took the easy way out, knowing that my answer would keep Matt's brains busy for awhile. “I fought in the war.”

The blank stare was colder than I had expected. Matt was like frozen in his seat. “So you've... killed people.”

I leaned back in my chair and watched Matt, knowing that this would be the last time I would see him. “Yes.”

That shut him up. It was clear that he had a lot of trouble processing the thought. “I'm sorry, but... Did you even read my profile, before you just started clicking like a maniac?” I laughed at the question and Matt let out a chuckle of sorts himself. “I mean, you're probably everything I said I disliked.”

“You should try new things too”, I said with a smile and drank some of the water.

The food was okay, not great, but eatable. I asked Matt to tell me about art history and that kept us going. He grew more relaxed as we ate and I wondered if his bad mood was just due to a low blood sugar. He asked me about Serbia and I told him generic shit about the landscape, Belgrade and the little I knew about the history before the wars. It was most definitely the nicest lunch I had had in Liberty City. But of course we finished eating in about 45 minutes.

I was nervous when we walked back to the car. “If you still need to be somewhere, I will drive you.”

“Well umm... Yeah, sure”, Matt said. “Could you take me to the Randolf Art Center at Galveston and Nickel?”

“Sure.” We got in and I took off towards north. “So. What is the judgment?” I had to glance at him to get some idea.

“Verdict.”

“What?” I didn't know the word.

“It's: what is the verdict? Not judgment.”

I accelerated after stopping at lights. “You judge me, you make a judgment. So what is it? Do you want to see me again?” Matt let out a series of “well”s and “umm”s. I felt my heart sink a little. I thought the lunch had gone great. It was hell of a lot better than the bowling with Michelle and she was still trying to get into my pants. “It is okay. We had a nice lunch”, I said and kept my eyes on the windscreen.

“I just don't know if I'm into you like that”, Matt started to explain, which made the whole thing a lot more uncomfortable.

“It is okay”, I repeated and I admit it did cross my mind to stop the car and make him walk the rest of the way.

“You're a nice guy.”

I smiled at the empty words. “You are a nice guy too. I hope you will meet someone you like.”

“You too. I mean, I'm sure you will. It's a big city.”

I drove rest of the way in silence. As I stopped at the art center I turned to Matt. “Would you still like to take my number? If you...” Change your mind. “Run into trouble. I can usually help. I know people.”

Matt thought about it and finally gave a nod. He took out his cell and I recited my number. “Ok.” He smiled a little. “It was nice meeting you.”

“You too.”

And then he was already walking away. I watched him go. It was still a nice view.

I'm not claiming that I forgot all about him after that, since his face was there every time I logged on to that damned dating site, but I had given up hope of him ever calling. He did, however. At one am when I was driving Little Jacob home from some party. I could hear loud music playing in the background.

“Hi, it's Matt. I don't know if you remember me”, he started out unsure.

I let out a laugh. It had been two weeks, not two years. “I remember you. What's up, Matt?”

He took a moment and laughed then too. “This is going to sound really stupid, but I was wondering if you knew anyone who could hook me up with some coke?”

My smile died on my face. “I hope you mean the cola”, I said sternly. The thought of Matt, my beautiful, round-assed, pouty-lipped Matt, doing drugs wasn't an image I wanted in my head. “You shouldn't touch drugs, they are bad for you.”

“Yeah, thanks mom”, Matt sneered. “So you can't help?”

“I could, but I don't want to.” I turned a corner and gave the car some gas.

“Okay. Well, nice talking--”

“Wait, wait!” I barked before the boy had the time to hang up. I had seen more than a few drug deals in Liberty City and a fair amount of them had turned ugly. I hated the thought of Matt being alone with some scum when guns were pulled out. “I don't want you to meet any dealers alone. Where are you now?”

“So you're going to help?”

Images of addicts flashed before my eyes and took over every memory I had of Matt. “Yes. Tell me where you are and I bring you some.” I tried to comfort myself by thinking that it was better for me to give the boy some good quality coke than for him to go and get some shit off the streets. Plus Matt would certainly rub some people in the wrong way with his looks.

Matt gave me the address and name of the club he was in and we hung up. Little Jacob was watching me curiously. I'm pretty sure he asked me, who it was I had been talking to. I told him the same story I had told Brucie. A kid cousin of a friend. For some reason I added that the cousin was a girl I had hooked up with. That kept Jacob talking for some time. He was happy, but that was about all I could tell because of his accent. As I dropped Jacob off I asked him for some coke to give to the kids and he had no trouble with it. Gave it for free even, for all the things I had done for him and laughed at me being a dealer now.

For some reason I drove to the apartment before heading out to the club. I stared at the black suit I had bought just few days ago and wondered how much of a cop I would look in it. I had bought it on a whim, driving past the Perseus one day with enough cash to finally go in. I thought it would look nice, but I had never had the guts to actually wear it and face the reactions. Now I took the suit off the closet and put it on, tie and everything. I had gotten another chance to meet Matt and I didn't want to look like a bum.

The club was small on Liberty City scale, but it took me time to find Matt, and his friends as it turned out. They were gathered in a large booth, Matt, three other boys and two girls. One of the boys was the owner of the white BMW. The others more or less froze in their seats at the sight of me, but Matt stood up.

“Niko, hi.”

We _shook hands_. I don't know why, but it pissed me off to no end. Like I was working for him too. “Hey.”

“You... got the stuff?” He had been drinking, but not a lot. Not on my scale. He was still seeing straight and was firm with his feet.

“Yes, I have it,” I said, bit annoyed for some reason. I didn't know what I had expected. Of course I was here just because of the coke. It wasn't like he wanted to hang out, I just was the only one he knew to be stupid enough to run around the city doing what he asked.

Matt waited a bit, before jamming his hand to his back pocket and fishing his wallet out. “So how much?”

“I am not a dealer, put your money away”, I said and now even Matt saw that I wasn't happy. I took the small bag out of my pocket and tossed it to the BMW driver. “You can have it for free, but Matt won't be taking it.”

“What?” Matt shouted, but the others just laughed and agreed. One of the girls let out an aww. “Fuck you!” Matt spat.

“Be careful with it, yeah?” I told the others. “It's good quality, powerful.” 

“Yeah, yeah. Thanks man!” one of the said in chipper voice.

I turned my eyes back to Matt, who was apparently sulking at me. “I don't want you doing drugs.”

“No one asked you!”

“Well next time you call someone else to deal your fucking drugs! It was nice fucking meeting you too!” I waived my hand and turned to leave. I had been an idiot to come here in the first place.

“Wait! Niko!”

I turned around. Mostly because I was so surprised that he still remembered my name. Probably read it from his cell. I waited for him to scale the chairs and walk to me, away from his friends. “I...” he sighed and adjusted his glasses. “You owe me a drink.”

Normally when someone told me I owed them something, I would wipe the floors with them. I was just about to shout something at Matt when I understood his meaning. “You want me to buy you a drink?” I asked with a laugh. It sounded too good to be true.

“Well you owe me that much after that shit”, he nodded his head towards the booth.

“Maybe I do. What do you want to drink?”

Matt shrugged. “Anything but beer, really.”

“Ok.”

I don't know what I ended up buying. I just told the bartender to make something out of vodka and showed him the amount of booze I wanted in the glass. They had the habit of making the drinks too soft here and yes, I wanted to get Matt drunk. I didn't have the time or privacy to start dating a guy at the moment and either I would get somewhere with the boy tonight or I would forget him.

When I returned to the table, Matt was standing next to it, talking to his friends. Someone told him I came back and he turned towards me with a smile. “Let's go sit there”, he said and pointed towards an empty table across the club, further away from the dance floor. I just nodded and followed him with my usual glass of water. If things started to look good, I could always drink a few and take a cab home. Or Matt's place. But I didn't want to spoil my chances by drinking too much too soon.

We sat down at the table, Matt on the couch behind it and I on a chair in front. “It is nice, now I can hear myself talk”, I said with a grin and Matt grinned back. He took a girly sip of his drink and coughed a few times. “It is good?”

“Great”, Matt said, but of course he was lying. It was too strong for him, but he would drink it out of politeness. Besides, he wouldn't taste the vodka after half a glass. “I'm sorry I called you with stuff like that.”

“I am sorry for ruining your plans.”

Matt waived his hand. “I'm kinda glad you did. I'm not really into coke, but everyone's doing it and when I told them I knew a guy like you, they just kept bugging me about calling you.”

“You don't do drugs then?”

“Not really, very rarely.”

“Then you should stop taking them at all. While you still can.”

Matt hemmed at my words. “You've seen a lot of addicts?”

“I have seen enough.” I really didn't want to talk about some junkies I had seen. I gulped down half of my water and wiped my mouth to the back of my hand. “So when are you moving to Europe?”

It seemed to startle Matt for some reason. “What?”

“You wrote in your profile that you are moving to Europe.”

“Oh. I did?” I couldn't tell what he was thinking, but he seemed to relax a little. “I've never really told anyone about it. And I don't know.” He waived his hand again. “It's just something I'd like to do. After I graduate.”

“Where would you like to move?”

I liked the dreamy look that came into Matt's eyes when I asked the question. Like he was already gone to some other country in his mind. I had had the same look when I had read Roman's bullshit emails and dreamed about coming to America. When I hadn't known how things here really were.

I would have liked to move and sit next to Matt, maybe put my arm around his shoulders, but I reminded myself that we were still in public. I could never risk someone seeing me like that.

“France maybe.” I let out a groan at Matt's poor choice and he laughed. “What? Should I go to Serbia instead?”

“Fuck no”, I spat out. “No one should go to Serbia. But there are a lot of smaller countries that have more to teach you than France. Hungary. Slovenia. Hell, even Croatia.”

“Well I'm not booking any flights just yet, so I have still time to think.”

Usually I would say that it was pure hell to watch someone get hammered while being sober myself, but with Matt that changed too. I kept to my water and bought Matt a new glass as soon as he finished the old one. He couldn't hold his liquor very well and it took maybe two hours before I decided that he was ready to leave. He wasn't throwing up yet and I wanted to keep it that way.

“Listen, I think I am going home now, it is getting late.”

Matt blinked few times and tried to get his cell out to check the time. “It's not late yet”, he insisted after fumbling with his phone. “I... I'm having a great time!” His smile was a bit hurt.

“Maybe you want to come with me?” I suggested, smoothly as a hedgehog.

“Oh.” Matt closed his mouth and started to think about it. I was glad he clearly understood immediately what it meant, if he came with me. I didn't want to start explaining any details out loud in public. “Well... Ok.”

“Great. Let's go.” I stood up and Matt followed after emptying his almost full glass with few gulps. He was nervous and quiet the whole ride, but I didn't mind. It just meant that I was his first and I had to take it slow. I glanced at him as I parked the car in front of my safe-house and took pity on him. “I do not mind that this is your first time.”

Matt jerked his face towards mine and his cheeks were red. “I... This...!”

I smiled at his panic. “I don't mind.” He shifted towards me, clearly trying to kiss me, but I placed my hand on his shoulder and pushed him back to his seat. “We go inside first.”

It wasn't like I was scared of coming out. I just knew that it would hurt my position and my businesses and maybe even Roman's. Assholes like Brucie wouldn't do any business with a fag, no matter how good I had been before he knew about it. And to be fair, I didn't feel like I needed to shout out loud about what kind of people I liked to fuck. It was nobody's business but mine.

Matt didn't argue. Maybe he was too terrified to do that. We walked in to my apartment, which immediately made me ashamed. It was dirty as hell, smelled of rotten food and mold. I hadn't had the time to clean it up properly even once after I arrived. Luckily the cockroaches decided to stay away.

I didn't have the time to make up excuses about the flat when Matt was already on me. It's hard to describe how good it felt to finally wrap my arms around someone and kiss them. Like someone had given me my soul back and I was a whole person again. At that moment I wasn't just a hired gun or an ex-soldier, I was me, Niko Bellic, just the way I was supposed to be.

I pushed Matt to sit on the sofa-bed and shoved Roman's porn magazines to the floor with one hand. Matt's hands were taking my clothes off, but it took too long for my taste and I helped him by ripping the dress shirt off without bothering with the buttons. I could always buy a new one anyway.

I was already naked before Matt had even gotten his shoes off, but I had to admit that undressing the boy was better than unwrapping any Christmas present I had ever got. We kissed again, this time slower and I had the opportunity to enjoy the taste of the boy. My hands traveled to his stomach and under his T-shirt to pull it away. Matt's glasses ended up on the floor too and I had to admit that he looked better without them, less nerdy. The boy was panting hard and shy about looking at me even when I hadn't turned on the lights and the room was lit only by the street lights outside.

“You can say if you don't want to do this”, I reminded Matt and the boy nodded quickly.

“It's okay, I just... I'm just nervous.”

I opened his jeans and pulled them off before pushing my hand inside his briefs. I jerked the boy until he was hard and stopped before he got too excited. It was clear that the booze had made an effect on Matt when he started to grind his junk against my hand and begged me to continue. I reached for the nightstand where I knew Roman had stocked condoms and pulled few of them out with a tube of hand cream. Matt was already fumbling with my cock, trying to jerk me off maybe, but not quite managing it in his stupor.

I pulled off Matt's briefs and took a moment to congratulate myself on getting the boy naked and wanting in my bed. I didn't get to admire the view very long before Matt started to thrust his hips upwards to meet mine. I kissed the boy again to calm him down and lifted one of his legs on to my shoulder.

Matt inhaled deep as I uncorked the tube and pressed a generous amount of the cream out. I smeared his ass with the cold substance before pressing a finger inside. Matt's jaw dropped open, but I could see from his expression that he had done this to himself before. He wasn't as surprised as some of the boys I had introduced to sex back home.

It took a fair amount of self-restraint to keep my pace slow after all those sexless months. Matt wasn't complaining after the second digit so I just went ahead and opened one of the condoms and started to roll it on. Matt was too busy staying conscious that he wasn't of any help. I didn't mind as long as he stayed right where he was.

I pressed the tip of my cock against his hole and smeared the cream around some more. I leaned better over him and pushed myself against him. His muscles gave away slowly, taking me in with twitchy spasms. I entered as slowly as I could, savoring every inch and the sweet pressure his ass was giving me. Matt was mewling under me, clawing my back and panting. I was half way in when he bit down on my shoulder. I didn't mind the small pain so I just pushed myself to the hilt and grunted as the boy clenched both his ass and his teeth.

We stayed there for a moment as I let him get adjusted. My cock was throbbing inside him and I thought I could almost come from the mere sight of me being buried deep in him. I pulled out slightly faster and made Matt gasp for air. The white cream around my cock and on his asshole made it look like Matt had already been fucked once and I was using the cum as a lubricant.

I continued pumping him slowly, stretching him completely and getting the boy past the painful part. When his cock started to react to my touch and his hips started to move on their own, I pulled completely out and turned him around. Matt didn't complain. He pressed his shoulders down against the mattress and lifted his ass up high, spreading his legs for me. I brushed my thumb against his reddish anus and made it twitch. After applying some more of the hand cream I aligned myself back against his hole and pushed myself in with one resolute move. Matt's body tried to move away, but I took a hold of his hips and pulled him back against me. His buttocks were clenching around me and the boy was gripping the sheets with both of his hands.

“Jerk yourself”, I said to him, so I could concentrate solely to the fucking. Matt's hand was a blur as he quickly complied. His voice was getting alarmingly loud, so I took the corner of my blanket and stuck it to his mouth.

I dropped my eyes to the point where our bodies merged and kept watching as my dick disappeared inside his burning hot circle. My hands grabbed Matt's hips tighter and I thought I would fuck the boy right through the sofa. I could feel only his tight muscles around me, pulling me deeper as I closed my eyes and let myself cum like a ton of C4.

I got to enjoy the feeling for ten seconds or so, before I received a sharp jab to my ribs from Matt's elbow. “I'm here too”, he growled. I chuckled at his impatient voice and pulled myself out. I searched for the bin with my eyes, but when I spotted it near the kitchen I just tossed the used rubber on to the floor. It wasn't like it could get any more dirty.

Concentrating back on Matt I lied down next to him and replaced his hand with my own on his cock. To give him something more I pushed two fingers back inside him as I started to jerk him off. It was nice to see him enjoy, his legs spreading and his mouth dropping open, the screaming-- Fuck, he was screaming again. I pulled my hand away from his ass and cupped his mouth with the palm of my hand. It felt like he melted right on to me, pressing as tightly as he could against my chest and letting out muffled moans. I pulled him yet tighter against me and felt his body spasm against me. His cum hit the sheets and my hand and I let go of his mouth.

Matt was gasping for air, his body sweaty and trembling. He reached for me hand and pulled it around himself and I had nothing against it. For too long I had had to sleep alone. 

We slept like that, spooning, the whole night. I got up around nine, but I expected Matt to have a hangover of his life and sleep until noon. I was about to let him do that too, but at half past ten I heard a key turn in the lock.

“Cousin?” Roman's voice called. “You awake?” Luckily he was wise enough not to barge right in to the apartment when he suspected me to be asleep. I was a mean bitch when woken up and I usually greeted any surprise visitors with a gun.

I reacted without thinking, rushed to the door and blocked Roman's view to the apartment.

“Good morning, cousin!” Roman laughed and slapped my shoulder, clearly trying to get past me. When I didn't budge he lifted his eyes to me. “What's wrong?”

“Nothing.” My hedgehog moments, yet again.

Roman was still for a moment and spread his hands. “You don't want me to come in?”

For a moment I pictured Roman's reactions when he found out about Matt. No, he would freak out. He had no clue about this shit. “I was just going out. We go together, have breakfast.”

Roman laughed and slapped my shoulder again. “Good idea. I have some business to talk to you too.”

“Wait for me outside. I get my jacket”, I said and nodded towards the stairs. My heart was pounding in my chest. 

Lucky for me Roman wasn't the brightest of men nor had he any reason to suspect anything weird. He left and I pulled the door back close. Matt hadn't even woken up. I walked to him and nudged his shoulder.

“Matt.”

“Unghh..?”

“I have to go. You should go home soon too.” I didn't even want to think about the possibility of someone else coming here and seeing him like this.

“Yearhm... okay...” the boy mumbled into the pillow.

“Okay. I'll call you, yeah?”

“Yeah... sure...”

I ruffled his hair a bit before getting my jacket and getting out.


End file.
